Mexican exchange student adjusting to America

When senior Maria Ramirez first came to Cedar Falls, she set out for independence and was determined to push herself out of her comfort zone. Now, two months in, Ramirez said she’s been busy adapting to the city.

Ramirez came from her home in Guadalajara, Jalisco, Mexico, to her host family in Cedar Falls on Aug. 5. Currently, Ramirez lives with her host mom, host dad and three host siblings. Their names are Annelie, Matt, Toby, Alexandra and Juliana Heinen. Ramirez said they’ve been welcoming, but different from Mexico. “The family is not together all the time. In Mexico, we’re all together, and we like being with each other, but here it’s like they always want to have their own time, alone. I think that living with someone, you get to know a lot of things about them.”

Ramirez said she was always an introvert, so having to come out of her shell was a big change for her. “In my house and in Mexico, I’ve always been very comfortable. You know, I lived in my own bubble, and I just wanted to get out of that comfort. I wanted to try new things. My communication and social skills are not the best, not even in my language. I wanted to learn how to be more independent.” 

Ramirez also said that she’s noticed a few changes in her character since arriving here. “I’ve noticed that I’ve been more patient and more extroverted because I need to be. I think if I wasn’t like that, I wouldn’t have anyone in my life. I have talked a lot more, not because I want to, but because I need to make friends and get to know new people.” 

Ramirez said there are a few differences between Mexican culture and her family compared to what she has found in America. “I think in my culture, everyone is just so friendly with each other, and we love to be together. All of our time eating together, everyone is talking.” Whereas in America, she said everyone is very busy all the time.

Ramirez said she misses the social connections and often feels lonely in her experiences. “My older brother was an exchange student in Minnesota, so I knew most things about it. What he didn’t tell me was that I was going to feel so lonely a lot of the time, and I bet my brother felt like that, but he would never say it.” 

Additionally, Ramirez said she  has struggled with finding true kindred spirits. “I have friends, but I have no one to talk to about how I actually feel. Here, sometimes I feel very lonely, like if you have a bad day and there’s no one to listen.” 

Ramirez also talked about the pressures of being an exchange student socially and how she feels the influence of her peers, but she stays true to herself. Often, she said she repeats the healing phrase her mother taught her in times of struggle. “All of the words you don’t like, they just need to slip like butter away from you.” She said this is something she’s gotten better at since arriving here as well. 

Though she is homesick at times, when she returns to Mexico, Ramirez said she will likely have to adjust again from her newly discovered freedoms in America. “I’m doing my own thing all the time. That’s going to be hard to leave. I wanted to come here because of that.”